We're bombarded with messages in society about how to be happy that do more harm than good. Things like white teeth, nice cars, substances, and clothes are supposed to do it for us, according to Madison Avenue. But you already know that what you're looking for can't be bought or put in your mouth.
The "work-life balance" we're supposed to seek is also an inadequate solution. Both of these approaches can actually prevent you from having the deep sense of happiness and well-being you're looking for.
So, what's the answer? Start by checking out my top articles using the links to the right, and then explore some of the other content and free resources below.
Related Articles
Amidst the uncertainty of a major life transition, it’s impossible to plan for every possibility ahead. But we don’t need to. We can see, even in nature, that there is an underlying order to things, even in the most chaotic times. We have an internal order, too.
When we learn to trust these, while also exercising our own wisdom where we can, we can make it through the difficult times and access our full potential.
If you’re stuck not knowing what to do next, because you aren’t sure what the right choice is, that’s not entirely bad. Before you flip a coin, react unwisely to the emotions you’re feeling, or pretend you know what you’re doing, consider staying with the uncertainty for a while.
Even in situations where it seems like your choices are equally good—or bad!—and you’re feeling confused and worried, arriving at your “I don’t know” is an important step in not just finding the right answer, but mastering your life.
Crises come in all different magnitudes, but they’re all anxiety-provoking, and that usually causes people to avoid them or tune out the pain and difficulty they bring.
But when you do that, you’re turning a blind eye to a beautiful and miraculous process. Difficult times are a prerequisite for growth, and crises are the signs of a life fully lived.
You may not like being bored, but boredom can actually be very good for you if sometimes you just let it be, settle into it, and see where it leads. It can even be good to induce boredom sometimes!
On the other side of boredom is clarity, insight, and stillness that, at a minimum, can be a healthy and pleasant break for you and, at best, can help you discover new solutions for old problems.
No matter how motivated you are to start, distraction is always ready to strike. Here's how to get your focus on target and keep it there, so you can finish tasks efficiently and move on to the next thing with peace of mind.
Procrastination is often deemed a problem with focus, willpower, or self-doubt, but that’s not the whole story. Also, simply making more effort isn’t necessarily the best approach for dealing with it.
Recent research identifies a connection between procrastination and your imagination, and points to a fresh way of getting unstuck and feeling inspired to take action right now. Here I walk you through the steps for doing just that, which have proven helpful for me and my clients.
Sometimes you don’t realize that you’ve misplaced or left behind parts of yourself, until you find yourself in a rut years later.
It happened to me: I came to fear that I’d lost a colorful, vibrant part of me. It took a simple pair of shoes to help me realize that it had been with me the whole time. Any “lost” parts of you are hiding in plain sight, too . . . .and counting on you to continue looking for them.
Regret is your mind's way of keeping you from repeating mistakes, but when it hangs around it can do more harm than good. Here I cover how your mind lays the groundwork for regret and how you can nip it in the bud.
For some people, it’s a matter of faith that every cloud has a silver lining. However, making meaning from difficulties is a very human, personal process that often requires effort, and not just blind faith.
If you’ve ever had to contend with a toxic coworker, a relative who gives you a hard time, or someone else you feel stuck with, who torments you, then you may have felt helpless to do anything but fight fire with fire. But there’s another option: be wise and strategic in your response, to defuse conflict and use the situation for your personal growth. Here’s how to do it.
Here’s are the top three ideas that, if you can internalize them, can help you bring resilience, performance, peace, and happiness into your life, and keep it there.
I gave a lecture series aboard a cruise ship, helping people find meaning and purpose in their daily lives. Before the trip was over, I’d have found a source of meaning just for me, lying on a remote beach, waiting for me to discover it.
Change is headed your way, whether you like it—and whether you see it coming—or not. Here are five ways to handle life transitions like a pro, and come out the other side stronger and happier.
Fear can show up even when you know you're making the best decision, so it's not a reliable indicator of what to do. Or is it? Here's how to get unstuck, and even use fear to your advantage, when it starts to creep up on you.
Was spending a Friday night in a sensory deprivation tank blissful? Not exactly, but it did illustrate the aversion and reactivity that causes us to suffer, and what we can do about it.
Self-doubt is rampant, especially among high functioning professionals. Procrastination and workaholism are just a couple of symptoms. Here's how to tell if you may be suffering from it, and what to do about it.
New Year's resolutions are notorious for flaming out quickly. Here's what you need to know about how to create lasting, positive change and feel great while doing it.
As good as social connection can be, it also leaves us vulnerable to being hurt by others. Here's how best to cope with it when it happens. Also, how hurt feelings can point to things inside you that could use some attention.
A reader of mine wanted to hear more about unhealthy relationships with food. Here's why it can be so hard to eat the types and amounts of food we want to, and how mindfulness can help.
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Our mind is a wonderful thing—except when it’s out of control, replaying painful, embarrassing, or shameful events from our past. Rumination isn’t just unpleasant, though. It retraumatizes us and reinforces negative beliefs (even though our mind is actually trying to help!).
Here’s a five-step approach to healing and growing where necessary, so you can stop dwelling on the past and start charting a new path forward.