5 Steps to Stop Thinking About the Past (in a Healthy Way)

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5 Steps to Stop Thinking About the Past (in a Healthy Way)

Our mind is a wonderful thing—except when it’s out of control, replaying painful, embarrassing, or shameful events from our past. Rumination isn’t just unpleasant, though. It retraumatizes us and reinforces negative beliefs (even though our mind is actually trying to help!).

Here’s a five-step approach to healing and growing where necessary, so you can stop dwelling on the past and start charting a new path forward.

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The Power of Not Knowing What to Do

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The Power of Not Knowing What to Do

If you’re stuck not knowing what to do next, because you aren’t sure what the right choice is, that’s not entirely bad. Before you flip a coin, react unwisely to the emotions you’re feeling, or pretend you know what you’re doing, consider staying with the uncertainty for a while.

Even in situations where it seems like your choices are equally good—or bad!—and you’re feeling confused and worried, arriving at your “I don’t know” is an important step in not just finding the right answer, but mastering your life.

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How Boredom Can Help You Succeed

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How Boredom Can Help You Succeed

You may not like being bored, but boredom can actually be very good for you if sometimes you just let it be, settle into it, and see where it leads. It can even be good to induce boredom sometimes!

On the other side of boredom is clarity, insight, and stillness that, at a minimum, can be a healthy and pleasant break for you and, at best, can help you discover new solutions for old problems.

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How to Get Focused and Stay Focused

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How to Get Focused and Stay Focused

No matter how motivated you are to start, distraction is always ready to strike. Here's how to get your focus on target and keep it there, so you can finish tasks efficiently and move on to the next thing with peace of mind.

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How to Stop Procrastination the Creative Way

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How to Stop Procrastination the Creative Way

Procrastination is often deemed a problem with focus, willpower, or self-doubt, but that’s not the whole story. Also, simply making more effort isn’t necessarily the best approach for dealing with it.

Recent research identifies a connection between procrastination and your imagination, and points to a fresh way of getting unstuck and feeling inspired to take action right now. Here I walk you through the steps for doing just that, which have proven helpful for me and my clients.

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Three Things You Can Do to Stop Being Haunted by Regret

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Three Things You Can Do to Stop Being Haunted by Regret

Regret is your mind's way of keeping you from repeating mistakes, but when it hangs around it can do more harm than good. Here I cover how your mind lays the groundwork for regret and how you can nip it in the bud. 

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"Everything Happens for a Reason": The Fact and Fiction Behind the Cliché

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"Everything Happens for a Reason": The Fact and Fiction Behind the Cliché

For some people, it’s a matter of faith that every cloud has a silver lining. However, making meaning from difficulties is a very human, personal process that often requires effort, and not just blind faith.

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How to Talk to Difficult People . . . and Be Glad You Did

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How to Talk to Difficult People . . . and Be Glad You Did

If you’ve ever had to contend with a toxic coworker, a relative who gives you a hard time, or someone else you feel stuck with, who torments you, then you may have felt helpless to do anything but fight fire with fire. But there’s another option: be wise and strategic in your response, to defuse conflict and use the situation for your personal growth. Here’s how to do it.

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Three Daily Affirmations for People Who Don't Like Affirmations

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Three Daily Affirmations for People Who Don't Like Affirmations

Here’s are the top three ideas that, if you can internalize them, can help you bring resilience, performance, peace, and happiness into your life, and keep it there.

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How to Get Unstuck When Fear is Holding You Back

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How to Get Unstuck When Fear is Holding You Back

Fear can show up even when you know you're making the best decision, so it's not a reliable indicator of what to do. Or is it? Here's how to get unstuck, and even use fear to your advantage, when it starts to creep up on you.

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